Hot Wrestling Takes So BAD They'll MELT Your Brain

9. Mike Quakenbush On Orange Cassidy

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AEW

Do you know who's a very relatable character perfect for a generation of people pummelled into numbed submission by the endless horrors of the 21st century?

Orange Cassidy.

He grabbed the zeitgeist. He realised that a lot of people are simply very tired. They are tired of caring because there is too much to care about. Grotesquely lopsided distribution of wealth. A culture war that nobody can win. Preventable tragedy upon preventable tragedy. The overwhelming sense that absolutely nothing will ever change and will in fact get worse.

Cassidy's nonchalance is more understandable than any other wrestler, and when he fires up - at the perfect time, always - it's more inspiring than it has any right to be. Maybe one day you'll try, and it might actually matter.

But do you know what is more relatable than that?

An ant.

Everybody knows what an ant is!

Everybody knows what a curtain is, and it wouldn’t make for a good pro wrestler. Fire Ant was a good and over act, but be realistic: it was only ever vaguely charming in a super niche context.

Disgraced CHIKARA founder Mike Quakenbush was Adam Ant, in a leaked email, that Cassidy was a no-hoper of character. Ants are where it's at, which is funny: Soldier Ant didn't just headline AEW All Out.

Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and current Undisputed WWE Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!