Ranking Every Wrestling Wedding EVER!
5. Kane And Lita
“The wedding from hell,” was what Jim Ross dubbed the bizarre marriage of Kane and Lita on Raw. This Beauty and the Beast romance came about because Matt Hardy (Lita’s storyline and real-life boyfriend) lost a match and she was forced to marry the monster, per the stipulation. Let that be a lesson to people: never put up the freedom of your boyfriend/girlfriend in a professional wrestling match!
WWE went all in on the absurdity of this one, and brought in a piano player and cellist to play Kane’s theme as he walked out, they also gave him a best man who was a little person with goth makeup. Lita came out in a black dress looking like she was more ready for a funeral than a wedding. This greatly displeased Kane. She told her husband to be that she loved and would “always love” Matt Hardy, which...in real life lasted a few more months. She then tore into Kane for a bit and finished by saying she wished he would rot in hell, to which he replied “That was lovely.” It was The Big Red Machine at his comedic best.
Trish Stratus also made an appearance, and had some unique attire on for the occasion...she was basically in her bra and panties. She told Lita to “open your heart, just like you opened your legs.” WWE’s official video on Youtube of the ceremony cuts this part out entirely.
Before Kane could say “I do” Matt Hardy came to the rescue. He beat up Kane, then tried to run off with Lita, only for a wall of fire on the entranceway to stop their getaway. Matt was chokeslammed through a table, and the unholy matrimony proceeded and formed one of wrestling’s strangest couples.
Even though WWE was on a bit of a downswing during this time, the wedding ceremony delivered some absurdly entertaining television for the night.