WWE: 10 Big Stars In Worthless WrestleMania Matches
3. Hulk Hogan And Brutus The Barber Beefcake vs. Money Inc. - WrestleMania 9
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0c7g6-8Mm5A Just think of how many classic Hulk Hogan WrestleMania moments there are. With his iconic battles with Andre the Giant, The Ultimate Warrior and The Rock, he may possibly have the biggest matches at the event's history. So what the heck was he doing in the fifth slot on the WrestleMania IX card after main-eventing the past four Manias? Ah, WrestleMania IX, the unloved child of the WrestleMania brand. On that night, Hogan was slated to team up with his favorite lackey Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake to battle The Million Dollar Man and I.R.S. of Money Inc. The match felt a good five years too late from being a big draw. And besides that, it went on way too long. It lasted twice the length of the Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna main event! With the whole card being pretty plain, it seemed a bit suspicious that Hogan was coming back just to fight for the tag team titles. And anyone who questioned his motivations beforehand were proven correct when he showed up in the main event to take the WWF Title that Bret Hart failed to capture. It was a pretty big jerk move on his part, considering he didn't put anyone else over before he left for WCW. Sounds pretty worthless all around.
As Rust Cohle from True Detective said "Life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. So be careful what you're good at."
Sadly, I can't solve a murder like Rust...or change a tire, or even tie a tie. But I do know all the lyrics to Hulk Hogan's "Real American" theme song and can easily name every Natural Born Thriller from the dying days of WCW. I was once ranked 21st in the United States in Tetris...on the Playstation 3 version...for about a week.
Follow along @AndrewSoucek and check out my podcast at wrestlingwithfriends.com