9. Triton The Archangel (Jon Mikl Thor) - Rock N Roll Nightmare
Disguising himself as a rock star named John Triton (great porn name), Triton The Archangel is on Earth to stop Satan and his minions from ruling the planet, but because Rock N Roll Nightmare was filmed in 7 days for $53,000, the forces of darkness are portrayed by a variety of evil glove puppets. Worse, the filmmakers clearly couldnt afford a decent costume for their hero, so they decided to settle on the skimpiest (and cheapest) outfit possible a cape and leather thong. While eye-catching, this is clearly not the preferred attire for saving the world, judging by the look on Triton's face. Then again, Satan is revealed to be a 7 inch puppet who looks and moves a lot like Tom Servo (from Mystery Science Theatre 3000), so saving the day doesnt prove much a challenge. You win this time! the demon announces, before vanishing in a cloud of purple smoke.
Ian Watson is the author of 'Midnight Movie Madness', a 600+ page guide to "bad" movies from 'Reefer Madness' to 'Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead.'
