1. Day of the Dead
You, maybe: "
Wait a second. Day of the Dead is a pretty old movie. Are you sure it's really too soon for a remake?" You might've had a leg to stand on had I been referring to the
Day of the Dead movie from the '80s (or the Mexican holiday, even), but I'm not, Faithful Reader. I'm really, really not. Despite the fact that
Day of the Dead was remade just five years ago, and despite the fact that it made no money at the box office, and nobody liked it, and critics hated it, somebody in Hollywood just had the bright idea to remake it
again. No joke. So what's the justification for scraping the bottom of the remake barrel for this one? We go straight to the source for an answer with producer Christa Campbell: "We want to keep it as close to the Romero version as possible to make sure that his fans are happy. These are not going to be zombies climbing walls and doing back flips like in
World War Z." Two things, Christa... firstly, if you want to keep Romeo fans happy, just don't make this movie. That's the best way to ensure that. Secondly... can you legitimately make a movie about backflipping zombies?
Will It Suck? Does a zombie like brains? Of
corpse it will! And on that incredibly astute pun, I leave you as I go settle into a remote cave for the next ten years. Enjoy the remakes, suckers!
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