10 Upcoming Movies You Couldn’t Make Me Watch With A Gun To My Head

The Film

That it's folks, we've finally got to the stage of culture where anything that is even remotely popular is appropriated by evil corporate Hollywood, intent on squeezing every drop of money out of it. We've had Angry Birds, we're getting Tetris, and coming in 2017, we have a movie literally about the sprites you use to react to your friends' "hilarious" Whatsapp messages.

Why Not Watch It?

There is no need for an Emoji movie. We've already had one stunningly well-made movie about emotions that was mature and educational and thoroughly delightful. It was called Inside Out.

Even worse, the vague synopsis that exists would have us believe that the film is about a special multi-emotional emoji setting out on a quest to become normal. A tale of abandoning exceptionalness for normalcy: what a lovely, life-affirming message that sounds. Of course it won't be that simple, but that too is so cliched it's painful.

So no, Emojimovie is not the fire emoji Sony want it to be, it's more like the monkey covering its eyes. Or the ice cream/poop.

Which of these movies are you actually excited to go and see? Share your thoughts below in the comments thread.