10 Weirdest Footballer Cameos In Movies

5. Mike Ashley - Goal III: Taking On The World

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Now, Mike Ashley is not a footballer, I know this, but since when has his suitability for a role ever stopped him taking it. The man's a slimy, greedy, two-faced, stack 'em high sell 'em low, jobs-for-the-boys, lied-to-parliament, exploitative shill, and he wound up running one of the most community-centric football clubs in the world.

He's not an actor either, but for the low, low price of just £3,000,000, he was allowed to have one line of dialogue in the final movie of the Goal! trilogy. Standing in an executive box, wearing a Newcastle United kit and with a face like a Goblin chewing a wasp, he offers "f*** off, Pique" as his sole contribution to the performing arts.

That's 1 million pounds per word.

Much like everything the man touches, Goal 3! was decried as an irredeemable low spot in the franchise and killed any plans for further films. Was this entirely Ashley's fault? Well, you'd expect not, but Newcastle United were one of the most competitive teams in the country before he got involved there and that decline's apparently not his fault either so, who knows.

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Managing Editor

WhatCulture's Managing Editor and Chief Reporter | Previously seen in Vice, Esquire, FourFourTwo, Sabotage Times, Loaded, The Set Pieces, and Mundial Magazine