8 Most Ridiculous Stephen King Adaptations Of All Time
5. Children Of The Corn V: Fields Of Terror (1998)
One reason why you should never wander alone through a cornfield after dark is because a lightning bolt might shoot out of the ground, transforming you into a worshipper of He Who Walks Behind The Rows. Then youll have to go through the motions as Lead Villain in Children Of The Corn V, another straight-to-tape seemquel from cash-in kings Dimension Films, proud home of Dracula III: Legacy, Mimic II and Hellraiser: Deader. In amongst the Creepy Kids, Idiot Victims and Cars That Wont Start is a plot about a quartet of teenage bozos that drive into a ditch outside a cult leaders cornfield. In a whopping contrivance, one of them realises its the same cult her brother ran off to join months earlier, and because subtlety, storytelling and narrative logic are anathema in the DTV Dungeon, tomorrow is the day hes going to be sacrificed to He Who Walks. Cynics who suggest that this franchise gives new meaning to the words pointless and repetitive are however sadly mistaken as Fields Of Terror boldly goes where no other low-rent horror flick dares and gives us the confrontation weve always wanted: Fred Williamson Vs David Carradine. Williamsons the cop come to throw Corn leader Carradine in jail or a hole in the ground, he doesnt care which, then as these two titans square up to each other, Carradines head splits open to reveal a mini flame-thrower inside his noggin, which burns Williamson like greasy spoon toast. Other than that, its fairly routine.
Ian Watson is the author of 'Midnight Movie Madness', a 600+ page guide to "bad" movies from 'Reefer Madness' to 'Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead.'