4. Jaxxon The Marvel Star Wars Comics
Why, Marvel? I know you slip up sometimes like when you created Slapstick but what on earth possessed your creative team to think that what Star Wars needed was a gun-toting rabbit smuggler. And no, he doesnt smuggle rabbits. He is a rabbit. Appearing only in a few Marvel comic strips, Jaxxon is... well imagine if the original concept of Han Solo as a green alien with gills had been kept. Thats kind of close to what Jaxxon is. Hes the rabbit equivalent of Han Solo. Except there are more puns in the strips featuring him than in an episode of Not Going Out. Jaxxons species is Lepi (a shortened form of the Latin word for rabbit), his ship is called the Rabbits Foot, he worships something called the Holy Hutch, and hes part of a group of smugglers called the Star Hoppers. And of course, his dialogue makes those excruciating romance monologues by Anakin and Padmé in the prequels look like Oscar Wilde. Because its just not possible for a Star Wars character to look cool when his lines include stuff like Well, hooray for your side! You must'a been eatin' your space-carrots." The fact that the comics writers deliberately took inspiration from Bugs Bunny cartoons makes the whole thing even worse. Jaxxon is an ill-conceived pun-laden monstrosity that should remain sealed in the Lucas archives forevermore.