10 Annoying Narrative Video Game Clichés That Need To Die

5. Has Anyone Seen My Stuff?

Often tacked onto the Unconscious Drag cliche at the beginning of this list, we have the laughably overused gimmick of having all of your equipment taken away from you at some point in the storyline. Traditionally your character will have fallen into enemy hands, stripped of his or her guns and knives and fruit and boomerangs, tied to a chair and left to rot. Without fail, at this point the enemy guards then wander off, presumably to watch The Bachelorette, and leave you just within reach of a candle or sharp stick or something else to release yourself from your bonds. And then begins the tedious business of sneaking around the dank sewers or corridors. First you find a melee weapon which has been carelessly left lying around - a knife or club or purple dildo; then you find a guard - and he will always be standing with his back to you; take him out, and now you have a gun. From here it's a laborious task to rebuild your arsenal until you're the one-man-army you were before you got your lights knocked out. It sounds tense and exciting, and it would be, had we not gone through this exact process hundreds of times in various games over the years. Now it's just a chore that no one would be bothered with were we given a choice.