Wasn't expecting that one, huh? Just hear me out. In Skyrim, Draugrs are ancient Nords who guard underground burial sites from greedy looters. Notice I said "ancient", as in "of or in time long past". If these zombies are ancient, then why in the world do the female Draugrs still have breast tissue? Not only that, but they're actually covered by fabric! That makes no sense whatsoever. Let me drop some science on you for a second. It takes roughly a year for a human body to completely decompose. Assuming that her clothing is made of leather, that material would have totally disintegrated after about three or four years. Therefore, it's completely contradictory for her entire body and outfit to have decomposed *except* for her breasts and top. The only feasible reason I can think of for including a model like this is because of a aggressive feminist within Bethesda who demanded that female zombies have as much of a chance of being killed as male zombies. Hopefully there's no one actually like that, but if you are that person and you're reading this, I have one thing to say to you... Don't you have anything better to worry about?
Eller likes a lot of old video games, and some new video games. Follow him on Twitter (@JordanEller) for updates about articles, but mostly silly jokes.
