4. Ashley Graham - Resident Evil 4
In Resident Evil 4, you play Leon, a rookie police officer who survived a zombie outbreak on his first day and somehow got promoted to Elite Special Agent by the Government, and then got promoted again, this time to guard the President's family. It's not exactly the most established career ladder, but hey, who are we to judge. Things were presumably going great at Leon's comfortable public sector job until the President's spoiled brat of a daughter, Ashley, gets kidnapped by murderous, parasite-infested Spaniards. Once Leon rescues Ashley, the true trial begins - now you have to put up with her shrill screams of "Leooooooon! Heeeeeeeeeeelp!" every 5 minutes as she offers zero resistance while being carried off by a hairy mountain of axe-murderer. There is a brief section in the Castle area where you can play as Ashley. Ashley is slightly less useless in this segment, as she can throw lanterns at the enemy cultists to mildly annoy them. This raises the question - why doesn't Ashley try to kill, hurt, or at the very least slow down the enemies who try to carry her away during the rest of the game? Leon could even teach her to use one of his guns from his outrageous arsenal. Spoiler Alert - At the end of the game, Ashley invites Leon back to her place for some *cough* overtime, however Leon declines. Presumably he has the sound of her cries for help (which could rival the sound of a dog whistle, pitch-wise) seared into his memory forever. Leon can only imagine the sounds Ashley might make during... overtime. Most Annoying quote: "Leon! Help!" Usually followed by, "Help! Help me Leon!"