7 Rock Legends Who Really Have No Business Still Being Alive

3. David Crosby

Born: 14 August 1941; Los Angeles, California Career Highlights: If there was a Mount Rushmore of folk rock, David Crosby's rotund, mustachioed visage would feature prominently thereon. A founding member of both The Byrds and Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, he is, depending on your personal views toward the folk rock idiom itself, either a transcendentally talented demigod or a criminally-overrated tub of goo. Crosby and The Byrds first exploded on the scene with their electrified cover version of Bob Dylan's "Mr. Tambourine Man," which quickly shot to number one on both the U.S. and U.K pop charts, establishing a permanent template for what folk rock was supposed to sound like, and became one of the most overplayed songs in the history of the universe. After leaving The Byrds and joining CSN(Y), Crosby continued to display an inspiring ability to write songs that only sound interesting if you've just smoked an ounce of weed. Notable Addictions: Alcohol, Cocaine, Heroin, Food Why He Should Be Dead: When you're 52 years old and you're already on your second liver, it's safe to say you've made a full-time occupation of substance abuse. When you've sold over 25 million records and you need Phil Collins to pay for your liver transplant, it's safe to say you need a new accountant. Unsurprisingly for a longtime drug addict, Crosby sports an impressive and wide-ranging criminal record, including convictions for heroin, cocaine, and marijuana possession, drunk-driving, hit-and-run, assorted firearm violations, and illegal possession of a hunting knife.