10 Irritating Stereotypes You Meet In Every Office

6. The Drunkard

Also Known As: The Party Girl, The Slosher, DUI DebbieIdentifying Traits: Showing up to work in the same clothes she wore yesterday, hair disheveled, eyes bloodshot, reeking of tequila and Vaseline, The Drunkard is chronically unable to differentiate between weeknights and weekends, or to recognize that the former is almost never an appropriate time for an all-night bender. Though she tells herself she's just going to stop for a quick after-work cocktail and go straight home, The Drunkard invariably finds herself regaining consciousness 12 hours later surrounded by a roomful of naked Guatemalan circus midgets, several of whom she may now be legally married to. Native Habitat: After work, it's whichever bar happens to be closest to the office. During work the next day, The Drunkard will spend as much time as possible hiding in the ladies' room with the lights off, isolating herself from bright lights and ringing phones in an attempt to ameliorate the effects of the previous night's revelry, as well as trying to recall the specific details of said revelry. Career Trajectory: Decidedly unpromising. In addition to the difficulty inherent in doing any job effectively on no sleep with a raging hangover, The Drunkard is further handicapped by aesthetic considerations, as it's exceedingly difficult to take any employee seriously who has gum in their hair.