9. It Is Illegal To Gossip In City Limits (Oakland, Florida)
This one is fantastic. It essentially makes being a teenager illegal, working in an office illegal, working in a salon illegal - doing nearly anything becomes criminal. People gossip. They always have and they always will, despite this brilliant attempt at making humanity less bitchy. If this law is actually abided by, then Oakland must be one of the quietest, creepiest, overtly nice places in the world. What would people talk about when they're frustrated? Do they simply walk around congratulating one another on being masters of the universe? Never being able to vent anger to a friend about that sandwich-stealing work colleague would make for the most passive aggressive population in the world. In fact, the enforcement of this law would probably result in more violent crime than ever before.
