No cat is your friend. Their cuteness is merely a disguise forged by Satan; the master of deception leading all of humanity astray. Now, the average person would not ordinarily admit to worshipping Satan - but ask someone if they love cats - and it's a completely different story. Little do you know they are one and the same. Rooms explode with an onslaught of coos and awws the moment a cat enters. And why shouldn't they - they're cute as buttons, right? Wrong. That, dear human, is your mind being infected by a demonic parasite called Toxoplasma gondii. If you call your feline fiend your "fur baby" and regularly update the world with photos of it as if it were the Egyptian Bastet herself, then you're probably more possessed than you thought. Before you protest your cat's innocence; wailing "Not my Smudge!" from the top of your lungs and showering your Hell spawn with treats, read the following warning signs. If your kitty ticks the boxes, it's time to call the priest...
