5 Classic Christmas Traditions That Are Completely Over-Rated

3. Family

Seldom is a family gathering a joyous occasion, and Christmas only accentuates the hatred between estrangedrelations. Often ending in arguments and tears, Christmas day naturally creates a common feeling of discord throughout the household that is only made worse every year later until one family member finally snaps and makes the front page of the paper.

Everyone hates their family. A solution to this is to either fake your own death, or just die; it may seem harsh, but just as the family pull into the driveway, it always seems like a viable option.

But do not worry, there are ways to help. Activities such as pulling a cracker and various awkward family games fuelled by large amounts of alcohol are all things that can delay confrontation. Hiding in enclosed spaces is also fairly helpful, and if planned correctly can be effective for hours and hours of solitary bliss. If all else fails, check into a hotel and enjoy the greatest day of your life, sitting in your underwear, mindlessly watching box set after box set of your favourite shows.

Inevitably the reality is that Christmas day ends in a mutual silence, with family members silently ruing their decision ever to have kids, and not to move away to foreign lands when they had the chance, idly kicking at the detritus of Christmas that will stay on the floor for days to come.