10 Times Doctor Who Was More Like Fifty Shades Of Grey

8. The Abzorbaloff's Extreme Restraint Fetish

Love and Monsters gave us one of the show's more memorable creations, the Abzorbaloff, a Northern accented green fat bloke with a Mohawk waddling along in a nappy. Despite extensive drug treatment and psychotherapy, many fans cannot rid their minds of the sight. A relative of the Slitheen/Blathereen/Windowleen, Abzorby was obvious a keen fan of the BDSM scene though he'd developed a far more reliable method of keeping his partners restrained than some cable cords or a scarf.

When Abzorby had decided a potential partner was ready, instead of taking them to his Red Room, he'd expedite the situation by simply absorbing their bodies into his, a solution which, one must agree, saves time and offers a 100% reliable bondage experience. Should the partner feel like a bit of humiliation, Abzorby could helpfully work it so that their face erupted on a choice green buttock and then he would sit on you. Several peers and MPs have paid more for less.