10 Absurd Things The Rock Threatened To Stick Up Your Candy Ass

Naturally, if you were suspected of vehicular manslaughter, you'd comply with the police and keep calm.

Not The Rock—at least regarding compliance.

At Survivor Series 1999, a mystery driver ran down Steve Austin at high speed while he pursed Triple H in the backstage area. In real life, ‘Stone Cold’ needed time to mend his wounds. In story, WWE and authorities started to investigate key superstars who were motivated enough to assault their rival in such a heinous way.

The storyline (up until the unfortunate reveal) was one of the more serious and intriguing WWE had, but that didn’t mean it was going to keep its mystique over time.

Or even the night after.

While being questioned about the run-down on the next RAW Is WAR, 'The People's Champion' informed the cops to find donuts and then detailed which way they needed to turn them, as well as exactly where to place them. What’s more absurd than the joke itself is that the gravity of what happened to Austin the night before escaped him.