10 Most Totally Random WWE Matches Ever
7. The Shield* Vs. The Miz, The Bar, Kane & Braun Strowman - TLC 2017
*Starring Kurt Angle.
A viral infection wrote Roman Reigns and Bray Wyatt out of TLC, which compelled Vince McMahon to concoct a mental - and deliriously entertaining - makeshift main event. This was a great over-delivery. Perhaps the rumours of his decline had been exaggerated.
The snake-bit Shield reunion mutated into something extravagantly bizarre, not that the originally scheduled match was normal. The originally teased match, if you recall, was probably even stranger than the immortal sight of Kurt Angle wearing riot gear.
This mind-f*ck first materialised when the Miz mocked Roman Reigns and claimed the Miztourage of Miz, Bo Dallas and Curtis Axel could defeat his old stable. The Bar were hastily thrown-together with Miz because just look at the other two men f*cking hell, and it was apparently decided that this three-man unit - comprised of former World and Tag Team champions - wasn't enough of a threat. So Braun Strowman got added. And then f*cking Kane, who never would f*ck off for long the boring bastard, arrived after a long hiatus to finalise:
Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins and Kurt Angle Vs. The Miz, Sheamus, Cesaro, Braun Strowman and Kane in a 5-on-3 Handicap Tables, Ladders & Chairs match.
In which Strowman was killed by a garbage compactor.
To build a Strowman Vs. Kane programme.
Which was grafted onto Brock Lesnar at Royal Rumble, replacing a Finn Bálor match.
Even though Finn Bálor won his big match at the same TLC pay-per-view.
On which he was meant to wrestle Bray Wyatt in drag.
*Watches Vince form circles on the ground hollering "whoop whoop whoopwhoopwhoop"*
Perhaps Vince wasn't the brilliant tactician you thought he was.