10 Things That Would Happen If Today’s WWE Wrote The Attitude Era
7. Tiger Ali Singh Main Events Every Episode Of RAW
Tiger Ali Singh again?
"He was the sh*ts! Unforgiven didn't draw, those Austin pops are dying down, WCW is kicking our ass...send him back to the warehouse, to Puerto Rico, wherever. He can't work."
"But he can talk! And the people hate 'im!"
"They don't like him. There's a difference."
Obviously, that is a theoretical conversation; in 2019, nobody questions Vince, and so he proceeds with this hopeless endeavour unimpeded because Tiger Ali Singh can talk. He is measurable rating poison, and the audience has literally been told this, but he can talk.
His schtick actually predated the Rock's iconic "It doesn't matter!" catchphrase, and, powered by the misplaced belief he had in himself, he cut a confidently suave and abrasive promo. The act was good - theoretically. He paid the women in the audience to kiss his problematically-named, sardine-chomping servant 'Babu', delaying the five-second count to rile up the crowd, and made them pick up the Benjamins from the ring canvas.
Good.
Sh*t.
Pal.
But, and here's the kicker, his matches were as boring as sh*t, and nobody wanted to watch them. So no matches then?
No, matches, plural: have him wrestle twice!