TNA Lockdown PPV 2012 Predictions & Preview

Tonight sees the return of TNA's all cage match PPV 'Lockdown'. Here are Whatculture.com's 100% accurate (give or take 99%) predictions for how the event will go down. Brother Devon Vs Robbie E - TV Title We've said it before and we'll say it again - why is Robbie E still employed by TNA? Moreover, why has Devon not been released since the split and absolute none feud with ex partner Bully Ray? Furthermore, who decided to give the TV title to someone like Devon when it could have been used to elevate an up-and-coming talent? The opening contest will take place in a steel cage which should hopefully limit the involvement of gigantic waste of space Rob Terry. Prediction: Devon goes over, possibly after interference from his opponents moronic bodyguard. Yawn. Matt Morgan Vs Crimson Predictably Matt Morgan has wound up feuding with his ex tag team partner. This is a rehash of his feuds with both Abyss and Hernandez with the only difference being Morgan has remained a babyface. Morgan has stated recently that he's considering a return to the WWE when his deal expires with TNA which to me would make TNA pretty stupid to have him end Crimson's winning streak. However, the streak has to end at some point and Morgan's a solid enough performer and a genuine threat to not make Big Red look weak. We expect this to be a sloppy brawl. Prediction: Matt Morgan wins and then leaves for WWE later. Gail Kim Vs Velvet Sky - TNA Knockouts Title With a distinct lack of legit competition for Kim at the moment the TNA women's division looks weaker than ever. Yet another pointless rehash of old feuds but this time inside a cage, which is always uncomfortable to watch when women are involved. The PPV is pretty dull so far, hu? Prediction: Gail Kim retains. New opponents please. Magnus & Samoa Joe Vs The Motorcity Machine Guns - TNA Tag Team Titles The Machine Guns are back - Hallelujah! Tag team wrestling may now resume regular awesome service. Unfortunately for Joe and Magnus the Guns should be champions again after this match, but TNA has actually invested time in making the champions look like a legit force so it would be a complete waste of time to have the belts change hands this soon. The Guns need to work their way back up the ladder much like they did before. It'll make great television and help rebuild the tag team division into a legit televisual treat. The addition of a cage should make this a match of the night contender. Prediction: Joe & Magnus play the role of heels and sneak away with the victory. Jeff Hardy Vs Kurt Angle - Grudge Match What better way for Kurt Angle to come back from an injury that has spoiled his Olympic return dream than to face the sloppy Jef Hardy inside a steel cage? Hardy and Angle are big event players who will definitely try and out do each other at every chance so look for some serious risk taking and probably an injury or two. This could be a TV blow off for Kurt so he can take some time off but knowing him it's unlikely. Match of the night? Very likely. Prediction: Hardy needs the win more than Kurt. Expect Angle to miss a big move from the top of the cage which allows Hardy to do something suicidal to please the 5 fans he has left. Bobby Roode Vs James Storm - World Heavyweight Title After six months of build up and one TV rematch we finally get to see the two ex-Beer Money team mates go one on one inside a steel cage for the World title. No cheap finish. No outside interference. Just two of the top names in the company laying it all on the line for the top prize in TNA ... and so far no sign of Sting! Prediction: As nice as it would be for this to be a one on one match I have a horrible feeling Dixie Carter will get involved somehow. Hopefully she wont cost Storm the belt as he's red hot as a babyface right now. Lethal Lockdown Match - Team Eric Vs Team Garrett A TNA main event that's centred around Eric Bischoff and his (arguably) talentless offspring? Oh, and Hulk Hogan's at ringside with Ric "I love WWE so much I'd leave TNA tomorrow" Flair? What more could you want? Isn't it amazing how excited folk were at the idea of Flair attending Wrestlemania and yet the thought of him bleeding at Lockdown is absolutely repulsive? OK, so the match shouldn't suck too much, especially with AJ, RVD, Kazarian, Daniels, Bully and Austin involved but remind me again why we should care about the reason they're fighting? Prediction: This is a hard one to call. Maybe Airies will turn and cost his team the match? Maybe daddy Bischoff wants some time off camera? Maybe Garrett needs to go away to actually learn how to wrestle a bit? To be honest it's more likely that Team Eric will be victorious but either way who really gives a crap. Wrestlemania was far from amazing but it's a tough act to follow especially for a disorganised promotion like TNA. The company is at a crossroads again and in very real danger of losing some of it's biggest names. The last thing it needs is to loose any more of its viewership. Will this years Lockdown act as the blowoff to many of the - ahem - 'top' feuds in TNA allowing Genesis to be the start of something fresh? Or will the boring as sin Hogan/Bischoff saga continue on for the millionth consecutive month causing even more viewers to turn the channel for good?