WWE Extreme Rules is the time of year where stipulation matches take centre stage, so what better time to look back at some of the strangest gimmick matches in wrestling history.
Kennel from Hell
WATCH IT HERE So a retired prison guard steals your dog, invites you over and tricks you into eating him. How do you get revenge? Challenge them to a, Kennel from Hell thats how! On paper it sounded intimidating. A cage surrounding the ring, a hell in the cell surrounding that and in between those rabid dogs. The only way to win was to escape both cages and outrun those angry dogs. Sounds exciting. Unfortunately it wasnt. The first (and last) Kennel from Hell, took place at WWF Unforgiven 1999, between Al Snow and the Big Bossman. Unforgiven was already an odd event before the Kennel even came out. The first match of the evening was part of a storyline where Val Venis replaced Steve Blackmans weapons bag with sex toys. By the time the Kennel match came on, the crowd, and even the commentators sounded exasperated. Firstly, the dogs werent exactly let loose. They were being controlled by dog trainers with leashes. While completely understandable, it killed the illusion entirely. On top of that, the dogs were more interested in defecating and riding each other. This all added up to a complete non event. Al and Bossman did their best, but Im not sure even the Rock could have made that match exciting. The most ridiculous part? As the wrestlers tried desperately to avoid being sent out to the area with the dogs, no one seemed to notice that the camera crew were already there and they were doing fine. Those cameramen are the real heroes.
Punjabi Prison
http://youtu.be/YO3SExyCiXY When a match is made with the Great Khali specifically in mind, you know its going to be a stinker. Basically, a cage made of bamboo with four doors, surrounded by a bigger bamboo cage. So far, simple. The competitors in the match can request that the inner door be opened, but if they dont make it out within 60 seconds, the door is padlocked from then on. If all four doors become padlocked, the wrestlers had to climb over the inner cage, which had BAMBOO SPIKES at the top. The first person to escape both cages, won. Khali has trouble executing a simple tag team match, and on the night he was replaced by the Big Show due to Elevated liver enzymes. The cage itself looked terrible, and I imagine it was a struggle to see clearly for the live audience. Believe it or not, they actually had another Punjabi Prison match the next year between Khali and Batista, and it was just as strange as the first one.
Scaffold Match
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltJcSVXXUnw Whats a more frightening idea than two wrestlers fighting high above a ring on a scaffold? Having to watch one of these matches. Again, it sounds exciting but the reality is very different. Most scaffold matches involve the wrestlers tip toeing around, trying their best not to fall, so very little wrestling actually happens. After all, they dont have much room to manoeuvre up there. The first famous scaffold match took place in the 70s, with scattered appearances over years. For the most part, mainstream wrestling has avoided the gimmick since the 80s. Not counting ECW, only a 2000 match between Kidman and Shane Douglas featured on a major Pay Per View. Most recently, TNA staged their own version known as Elevation X in which AJ Styles and Rhino tried their best, but unfortunately the match was nothing new. No matter how controlled, scaffold matches are dangerous (see Jim Cornette smashing his knees in his fall at Starrcade 1986.) Its a gimmick match that hopefully weve seen the last of.
King of the Mountain
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGHhv724SM8 Speaking of TNA, theyve had their fair share of whacky gimmicks, none more needlessly over complicated as the King of the Mountain match. In order to become eligible to win the match, you have to score a fall. The person who is pinned, has to go into a penalty box, which is a cage. Once youve secured a fall, the object is to get the title belt, climb a ladder and hang the belt from a hook. To be fair to TNA, some of the matches havent been that bad thanks to the effort of stars like AJ Styles, Kurt Angle and more making the best of a tricky gimmick. Once a mainstay of the Slammiversary event, the King of the Mountain match hasnt been used since 2009.
Reverse Battle Royal
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKlNp7frkGc Sticking with TNA, heres another strange one. In another attempt to innovate their own gimmick matches, TNA came up with this twist on the classic Battle Royal/Royal Rumble. This, as the name implies, starts off with the competitors on the outside of the ring rather than inside. The first 8 competitors who manage to make it into the ring then compete in a traditional over the top rope match. But thats not all. The final two left in the ring, then take each other on in a normal pin fall match. Again, it featured some really good workers but it was such a surreal sight to see. Its hard to suspend your disbelief when you see wrestlers setting up moves on the top rope or apron instead of just getting into the ring. Your opponent is lying down on the floor, stop stomping on him and get in the ring! There are moments where you can see Lance Hoyt just wandering around. GET IN THE RING! If youre one of those people who gets frustrated when wrestlers climb the cage instead of using the door, steer clear of the first few minutes of this one. As an added bonus, Kip James (Billy Gunn) ring gear is terrible.
Feast or Fired
Feast or Fired by Rene-y2j-Madsen I'm not picking on TNA, I swear, but unfortunately here they are again. The feast or fired match was almost like their answer to the hugely successful Money in the Bank match in WWE. I can almost imagine the booking meeting, They have one briefcase. LETS GET FOUR! The premise is similar in that three of the briefcases have different title shots in them, but the fourth briefcase would result in the wrestler being fired. Competitors had to fight to reach the briefcases on poles in the four corners of the ring. The most frustrating thing they did with the Feast or Fired concept, was drag out the opening of the cases like a strange wrestling episode of Deal or no Deal. Also at one stage they decided that three of the briefcases wouldnt even be opened on the Pay Per View, so the paying audience didnt even get to see the payoff of the match. Again, I cant fault the match itself, which just goes to show that TNA definitely has the talent, but they are being saddled with some questionable booking at times.
Kiss My Ass Match
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYtEQUNckVY The loser has to kiss the other persons ass. Do I need to say anything else?
Over The Top/Off With The Top Match
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sexml1loxGQ One from the Attitude era that Linda McMahon would rather we all forget. Also known as the Topless Top Rope Match, the first one was the brainchild of McMahon/Helmsley faction leader and resident creep, Triple H. Being the heel that he was, HHH forced BB and Terri into a situation where they were represented by a wrestler, and each time their man was thrown over the top, they had to remove some clothes. HHH even hosted the match himself, so he could get a front row look. Of course, wrestling being wrestling, it was all a big tease. When the top finally did come off, Triple H got himself a private show instead. They did the same tease a few months later, when Steven Richards executed his Right to Censor just as Terri was about to lose her double barrelled slingshot. JRs words, not mine.
Junk Yard Invitational
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R2cXWdRUWQ8 WCW had a bad habit for going overboard with gimmicks. None was more costly to their wrestlers health than the 1999 Junkyard Invitational at Bash at the Beach. And so a lot of WCW Hardcore wrestlers had a massive brawl in a junkyard, with the winner being whoever could escape first. A few wrestlers left the match with legitimate injuries. The match started off with everyone in a big circle of cars, then just degenerated from there. It was dark and hard to see what was going on and the action had seemingly no structure. A helicopter camera didnt really make things any clearer. It also didnt help that they kept cutting away as moves were actually happening. Cars were tipped over, people were electrocuted, things blew up. It was absolute mayhem, and not the entertaining type. Keep in mind that this was on their big summer Pay Per View. The live audience for Bash at the Beach would have had to watch this all on a big screen. Fit Finley eventually left the Junkyard unchallenged to win the match. But the definite highlight was Bobby Heenans commentary.
King of the Road Match
Dustin Rhodes vs. Blacktop Bully-King of The... by TSteck160 Someone at WCW decided that staging a match on the back of a flatbed truck was a good idea. Blacktop Bully (Smash) took on Dustin Rhodes as the truck was supposedly driven around. The object of the match was to reach a horn in the cage on the back of the truck and sound it. Like the Junkyard match, this was another poorly thought out idea. The truck wasnt moving that fast, but was still fast enough that both men struggled to move around comfortably. On top of this, cameras were shaky and the helicopter shots didnt make anything clearer. At least they were smart enough to tape it before the show instead of having it live allowing for editing. Unfortunately, the editing wasnt great either. It took so long to do that on the original VHS you could actually see it changing from night to day and back again. Its truly horrible to watch.
Concrete Crypt Match
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I8KTSOm1nZE Being around for two decades means Undertaker has seen it all. Inferno matches, Casket matches, Buried alive matches. Undertaker has been in more gimmick matches than anyone. I cant speak for the Deadman but he must look back at the Great American Bash 2004 and wonder why he ever agreed to the Concrete Crypt match. The match itself was actually just a normal handicap match between Undertaker and the Dudleys, so technically not a gimmick match. The stipulation however was that if Undertaker lost, Paul Bearer would be buried in cement. Undertaker won the match but decided that he may as well bury Paul in cement anyway, and threw a lever on the truck. Strange thing was that WWE had taped the cement stunt earlier in the day, and cut between live and pre taped for the PPV. For the live audience, a Paul Bearer body double was in the case, while people at home saw the pre recorded footage. In a rare mistake by the company, they accidentally released footage of Undertaker and Paul rehearsing the stunt before the match even aired.
Anal Explosion Match
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShgRtPNfAQA Yes you did read that right and of course it happened in Japan. I sure saved the best till last. October 29th 1999, Korakuen Hall, Tokyo. Hayabusa and H were in the middle of a feud and H challenged him to a match where the loser would have to have a fire cracker set off in their ass. I would describe it in more detail, but a) I dont feel I can do it justice and b) I dont want to have to ever watch it again. The sight of Hayabusa sticking a firework in another mans back passage is one I could have easily lived without. Also if you speak Japanese, please translate the commentary. What I wouldnt give to hear JR call play by play on that.
Honorable Mentions Bread Eating Death Match: http://youtu.be/iRHEvE4CW38 Hart Family Dungeon Match: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Hgt-0id024 Grocery Market Match: http://youtu.be/6Dualm0Ro6Q