8 Wrestlers Who Tried To Look Cool (...& Immediately ATE Sh*t)

6. Vince McMahon Tries To Lay Down The Law

Vince McMahon Royal Rumble 2005

At the 2005 Royal Rumble, WWE went one better than even the great Bret Hart. 

WWE’s promotional muscle had atrophied since the Attitude Era, but the company was able to flex both biceps in the finishing sequence of the titular match. WWE had two babyfaces ready to launch in John Cena and Batista, and with two World titles to gun for, the long-term future of both Raw and SmackDown was secured. To illustrate that WWE had in its pocket two equally promising babyface sensations, literally on equal footing, both Cena and Batista, in a retread of the 1994 Royal Rumble finish, dramatically spilled over the top rope at the exact same time. They could not have timed that spot better if they’d had 10,000 more goes at it. In terms of physical timing and a bold statement about WWE’s future, this was no-notes perfect. 

That’s what Vince McMahon should have pretended happened. In actual fact, the finish was botched; Batista was meant to win. Vince could have stopped for a few seconds, realised that the accidental finish was amazing, and called an audible. He could have traded two torn quadriceps muscles for a lucrative No Way Out main event. That’s a good deal, right? 

Instead, he marched out to the ring, never more furious in his life. Giving away the botch to those who knew - and in 2005, everybody did - he made Cena and Batista look like uncoordinated greenhorn idiots. In trying to get to the ring, communicating to all that he was very cross and authoritative, he tore his legs apart. 

Truly a genius.  

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Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick (Creative Writing BA Hons) is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over a decade of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential UK institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and Undisputed WWE Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!