10 Heroically Terrible Superpowers Writers Should Feel Embarrassed They Invented

2. NFL SuperPro

Some worry that certain superheroes won't translate overseas. Captain America? Why does a kid in Germany care about him? But the patriotic likes of Cap have internationally transcendent characteristics, stories, and powers. NFL SuperPro meanwhile, is a dude in an invulnerable American football uniform whose origin story involves a van of rare football memorabilia being stolen and who was created - according to writer Fabian Nicieza - so he could get free NFL tickets. He wasn't big anywhere else, or even in the US in fact. It's a far cry from the ultimately misguided Dazzler multi-media scheme, which at least had real money and plans involved. This was in the early 90s, where Marvel were in Chapter 11 bankruptcy and so had to lower their sights a little. Or a lot, in the case of Phil Grayfield, sports journalist who had missed his shot at becoming a star quarterback after suffering a knee injury (truly this tragic backstory makes SuperPro Marvel's Batman). One day he interviewed an "eccentric" sports fan who just happened to be a mad scientist on the side, who bequeathed his invincible football uniform to Phil for...some reason. Hey, you like football, you'll like this regardless! Then thieves steal a bunch of the sports fan/scientist's collection and burn the rest. A combination of weird chemicals and the melting NFL merchandise gets inhaled by Phil in an origin that makes Peter Parker's look safe to replicate in real life, and combined with the armour he becomes...NFL SuperPro, fighting evil wherever it may rear its ugly head, provided the "wherever" is a football field and the "evil" is in some way football-themed! NFL SuperPro was cancelled after 12 issues.