6. Powerless Peter Parker
Marvel ComicsWhat's the thing that draws people to superheroes, that makes them an enduring part of our cultural landscape? Well, one is that they provide a sort of escapism from our boring, everyday lives, with their high-flying adventures and amazing powers that we could only imagine having. So it makes sense to do a series where they don't have those high-flying adventures and amazing powers, right? Yeah it doesn't make any sense to us either, and yet it happened with 2004's Powerless limited series by writers Matt Cherniss and Peter Johnson and artist Michael Gaydos. Along with a Wolverine who has spring-loaded claws he wears on the back of his hand and a Bruce Banner who suffers from a split personality disorder - one being nice and civil, the other one you wouldn't like when he's angry - and a Peter Parker who was still bitten by a radioactive spider and became Spider-Man. Except that the spider's bite caused his arm to atrophy and go all gross, and he instead became a legendary hacker given the nickname Spider-Man by his fellow hax0rs. The premise of Powerless is that the whole Marvel Universe has been going on in the heads of mental patients, as a psychologist awakens in a hospital bed and his told by his doctor - Susan Storm - that he had been in a coma for three days after collapsing outside his home, during which time he had colourful, vivid dreams about a world of superheroes. Meanwhile, in his neighbouring rooms he can hear the rantings of fellow patients Emma Frost (ranting about "Scott" choosing "that skank Jean" over her) and Peter, a kid whose Aunt thinks he needs treatment for the depression his totally messed up arm has caused. Still, weird though that is at least this Spidey gets to go out with Gwen Stacy, and the biggest threat Norman Osborn poses in his life is trying to recruit him to conduct industrial espionage during the kid's internship at Stark Industries. Powerless Petey comes up with the "with great power comes great responsibility" line all on his own, deciding to defeat Osborn using his l33t computer skills. Which he does. Which is...fun? But not Spider-Man. Kinda crazily far from Spider-Man, in fact.