4. Cinema Ads
Specifically recent ones at the cinema I go to where two talking pieces of well-known coloured-shell chocolate introduce footage from a red carpet premiere of an upcoming movie with the same dialogue every single time as if caught in some perpetual loop. Cue a 30 second promo featuring the actors saying how real we tried to make it, you know, as an experience coupled with the best swordfight/explosion/nude scene from the film. That is annoying at the best of times, but when I went to see The Dark Knight Rises, the film they were previewing and bigging up was The Dark Knight Rises. To be honest , I know that film is going to be good - thats why I paid to see it about half an hour ago, thats why Im in this seat. In fact, itll be on in a minute, why not stay around with me and watch it so I can eat your stupid red and yellow faces? Its like a stripper coming on before she starts the act, running through a series of very quick stills of her anatomy, mentioning how ace the show is going to be, before heading back off stage for 10 minutes.
Tip to avoid spoilers: Eat enough Minstrels and Maltesers to put the sponsors out of business.