20 Recent Movies EVERYONE Knew Would Suck

5. The Mortuary Assistant

THE MORTUARY ASSISTANT
Shudder

Considering that Hollywood is going all-in on video game adaptations right now and horror is as fool-proof as it gets, it was certainly a bit of an eyebrow-raiser that the movie based on hit 2022 indie horror game The Mortuary Assistant was released in barely 200 U.S. cinemas with scarce marketing.

Given the viral popularity of the game, there was easy potential for an Iron Lung-esque breakout here if the film was good, though considering how little fuss distributor Shudder made about it pre-release, it was tough to believe.

And indeed, despite solid enough performances from leads Willa Holland and Paul Sparks, The Mortuary Assistant was a languid adaptation that simply failed to muster the elemental scares of its source material.

Fans of the game weren't impressed at all, but even as a horror film on its own terms, why watch this when you watch the similarly premised but vastly superior The Autopsy of Jane Doe instead?

 
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Stay at home dad who spends as much time teaching his kids the merits of Martin Scorsese as possible (against the missus' wishes). General video game, TV and film nut. Occasional sports fan. Full time loon.