10 Annoying Narrative Video Game Clichés That Need To Die

8. Abandoned Locations That Aren't Abandoned

If you're a game character, and you're asked to mosey on over to an abandoned mine/space station/lighthouse/anything, tell your commanding officer you've taken an arrow to the knee and will have to sit this one out. You're effectively being sent to your doom. It's the nature of interactive storytelling - why would the plot call for you to scurry off to some monstrous dormant space installation to investigate a malfunctioning signal beacon or find some old clues, only to have you come back right away without a hitch? Ain't nobody got time for that! So yes, once you're sent to the Ancient Silent Ruins of Virginbeard to recover the mystical Lost Codpiece (+1 Loneliness), you can bet your life that things are about to turn pear-shaped. We've been doing this stuff for years now, they needn't beat around the bush anymore. Just tell us, "Look, there's this old sacred burial ground, it's supposedly deserted, right, only it's most definitely not. Lets face it, it's bloody crawling with beasties. Point is, there's a book in one of the tombs there that we need, and you're going to get it for us. It's got a recipe for a rather fantastic quiche in it. Oh, and be sure to arm yourself to the teeth, it's going to get... exciting". Instead we're force-fed the same weak rubbish, and because games are still for the most part very linear, we have no choice but to go along with it. It's another story device carried over from the film industry, but that's no excuse - we've been down this same road far too often, and it's time that the creatives come up with new ways to surprise us. We're not surprised anymore, ok? We're bored.