10 Seriously Dark Video Game Endings

8: Conker’s Bad Fur Day

Since we’re on the topic of games that seem all bright and fun and find wildly depressing ways to end, let’s talk about Rare’s 2001 action game for N64, Conker’s Bad Fur Day. Your first tip off that this isn’t Mario is that Conker is an alcoholic squirrel heading home after a night of heavy drinking and s**t-talking to go back to his girlfriend Berri. What ensues is a series of complications including taking on a giant singing pile of feces, having to fight militant teddy bears, and countering a scheme set by the Panther King to capture Conker.

In your confrontation with the Panther King, Berri is shot and killed by the head of the Weasel Mafia. Fast forward and we’re fighting an alien in space with a katana that Conker demanded the programmers provide him with. After winning, he’s crowned king of the land.

Yeah, this game goes places.

But Berri is still dead and Conker expresses remorse for not asking the programmers to bring her back, realising he lost his chance to bargain with them. The game ends with Conker ruminating on wishing he appreciated what he already had, and after the credits we see him drunkenly exiting the bar as a storm approaches, heading off in the opposite direction than he took at the game’s start.

If that sounds pretty dark the original ending allegedly had Conker put a gun to his head but Rare decided it was too dark so maybe we got off easy.