5 Real-Life Crimes Gamers Commit Every Day

2. Simply Owning A Games Console (If You Lived In China Last Year)

This one's pretty hard to believe, especially seeing as China has the largest PC gaming sector in world - worth an estimated $6 billion - but from the year 2000 until just a few months ago, it was completely illegal to own a games console. And the Chinese government's reason for this? Worries that the "mental health" of Chinese people would be adversely affected, obviously. So there's your proof that PC players are genetically superior. Although the ban is now lifted, there are still very strict sanctions on what can go into games and even how long you can play them for. Skeletons, for example, are absolutely not permitted, and must either be "fleshed out" or removed entirely, as was the case for the their localised World of Warcraft. But this is fair enough because skeletons are horrifying and unnatural, and I'd definitely have a breakdown if I saw one. Nor must you include anything that "damages the nation's glory," so no references to Jackie Chan's Rumble In Hong Kong. Interestingly, however, the move to lift the ban comes after Microsoft invested $38.71 million in Chinese media group BesTV. Hm.
 
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CiarĂ¡n Utting loves video games and books with pictures of speedboats on the cover. There's plenty more of his drivel on Twitter @CiaranUtting