9 Video Game Mascots We Absolutely Hated
8. Blinx
It's difficult for a multi-billion business megacorp like Microsoft to project an image of cuddliness, which is why for many years their de facto mascot was an overly officious paperclip. When Bill Gates reached into his exceedingly deep pockets as the company attempted to bludgeon their way into the video game industry at the turn of the millennium, they realised they'd need their own figurehead, one which wasn't a pane of stained glass.
Who better for the task than Naoto Ohshima, the man who a dozen years earlier had invented none other than Sonic the Hedgehog? Regrettably, lightning wouldn't strike twice: after a lengthy process no doubt consisting of copious consultation and market research, the Silicon Valley glaziers effectively came up with The Simpsons' Poochie. Microsoft went from Minesweeper to the Time Sweeper Blinx, every bit your typical '90s cool furry dude - which would have been perfectly fine, 'rad' even, save for the fact the crystal-specced cat clawed his way into the world in 2002.
Was the game itself any cop? Not really. If Blinx' design was rooted in the '90s, the advertising thrust came from a decade earlier. Though billed as 'the world's first 4D action game', Microsoft's feline debutante was, of course, a bog-standard 3D platformer. Even brandishing a vacuum cleaner couldn't help distinguish bland Blinx, given it arrived a full year after the spooky sucking of Luigi's Mansion.
Ultimately, Microsoft sent Blinx back to his home planet when they stumbled upon a more appropriate mascot for their company: Master Chief, a soulless, faceless space soldier.