3. Grab Some Heavy Ordnance
When an RPG is the most imaginative weapon you can wield in a series known for its irreverence, you know something's gone very wrong indeed. Yet sadly, this was the predicament we found ourselves faced with in GTA IV, and all for the sake of realism. Well I don't play a videogame for realism. If I wanted a dose of that, I'd actually go outside. I play a game to see what boundaries can be pushed. I don't just want to drive cars, I want to throw buses off cliff-sides. I don't only want to fight, I want to dildo-whip my enemies into submission. And I don't want realistic gun-fights, I want giant escapades of carnage-strewn badass-ness. To be fair, GTA San Andreas knew this, and it knew it well. In response, it gave us the minigun a cylinder of doom you could use to take on the police, perforate vehicles or pacify small island nations. And frankly, If grabbing a gun that's more at home hanging off the side of a plane and taking on the authorities in a storm of bullet-soaked vengeance while clad in Didier Sach's finest luminous green suit (with matching bowler hat, naturally) was wrong, then dammit, I don't want to be right. Honestly, I felt like the most pimpingly awesome terminator ever to don an outlandish suit, and I'm pretty sure that was the aim. So please, GTA, let's include more bonkers weapons this time around I'm sick of the M4-and-grenade combo being the apex of my arsenal, so here's hoping Michael, Trevor and Franklin can break out the outlandish ordnance on a regular basis.