22 Problems Only Call Centre Workers Will Understand
13. The Awkward Small Talk Waiting For Your System To Load
Ah, that excruciating moment your screen freezes and you're forced to engage in the dullest small talk imaginable. "What's the weather like where you are?" "I don't know, I'm in an industrial cube of calls drowning in artificial life and the glare of computers. Tell me more about this alien world of 'outside' you speak of"
12. Calling A Customer A As Your Work Mate Nods To Your Mute Button
"Oh what a tw*t this guy is!" you declare. Ensue mini-panic attack when the irrational thought you may not have slipped the mute button stems into your consciousness. It's like the inbuilt paranoia freak-out when you think you forgot to lock your front door, only ten times worse.
11. When An Older Colleague Tells You They've Been Working There For 23547597 Years
Oh god. Am I too, going to die here? Scary thing is, the colleague telling you such a thing is fully committed to the fact they're there until they rot. What's more, they're happy about it. God it makes you nauseous, doesn't it?
10. When Your Manager Announces You Have An Hour Off The Phone For Training
Oh, the sweet, sweet euphoria as the boss tells you to wrap up and clock into 'Meeting'. In all sincerity: perhaps 60 minutes isn't long enough? We have about five pages of questions we still need to ask, and we're pretty sure the company will go under if we don't read PowerPoint presentations until the clock strikes five.
9. Your Sincerity As You Say "I'm Very Sorry You Feel This Way"
The added hilarity when you squeeze in a "Of course we value you as a customer" and "I understand" between their monotonous ranting. I am trying to help you solve your first problem, Mr. Douchebag, but please, keep showering me with additional rants and extraneous unrelated personal feelings. If you know everything, then why are you calling us?
8. The Eye-Rolling Moment Your Customer Asks For A Manager
I'll be happy to let you speak to my Manager... just give me a second to explain how much of a pest you are to them. This can however, be a blessing; like when you're real tired of a customers cr*p and the M word is mentioned even just once. Your manager will try and get out of it, but you must not give in. The customer INSISTED and wouldn't take no for an answer. "Ah, put them through." Shazam!
