10 Dumbest Things In Star Trek (2009)

6. Safety Last

Star Trek Kirk Hands
Paramount Pictures

What is it with action adventure movies and bottomless pits? In the old days a cliché danger was quicksand. Nowadays it's gigantic plunges into the abyss. Past cinematics Treks guilty of this were Star Trek III and Kruge's drop on the Genesis Planet, and Nemesis with its inexplicable high-dive from the lowermost decks of the Enterprise-E.

But those are nothing compared to the ultra-unsafe workplace that is the Narada, the interior of which takes its safety cues from that galaxy far far away in Star Wars, where the only guardrail seems to be the Force. The Narada's guts are a nightmare of pointy hazards, wet surfaces, pointlessly staggered walkways, and "watch your step" drops, with nary a guardrail to be seen.

One must assume there’s no Romulan Equivalent of the HSE or OSHA (Health and Safety Executive in Britain, Occupational Safety and Health Administration in the US). I guess Romulans and their martial “if we are the stronger” mentality must figure it weeds out weaklings. Darwin Awards to everyone not as nimble as a mountain goat.

 
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Contributor
Contributor

Maurice is one of the founders of FACT TREK (www.facttrek.com), a project dedicated to untangling 50+ years of mythology about the original Star Trek and its place in TV history. He's also a screenwriter, writer, and videogame industry vet with scars to show for it. In that latter capacity he game designer/writer on the Sega Genesis/SNES "Star Trek: Deep Space Nine — Crossroads of Time" game, as well as Dreamcast "Ecco the Dolphin, Defender of the Future" where Tom Baker performed words he wrote.