Doctor Who: The 10 Most Pathetic Plans Put Forward By Villains

2. The Abzorbaloff's Meal

The Abzorbaloff creature first finds a group of humans €“ known collectively as London Investigative 'N' Detective Agency or LINDA €“ who are tracking the Doctor. He then uses their knowledge to find Jackie in an attempt to hopefully find Rose. All so that he may eventually hunt down and absorb the Doctor, for "the ultimate meal" and thus enjoy the wealth of the Doctors' lives and experiences for himself. What Makes This Pathetic? Despite the intricacy of the explanation above, this alien could have done a much better job planning. LINDA is ridiculously inefficient, so there had to be better choices: Sarah Jane, Luke, and Mr. Smith, for example, or raiding UNIT or Torchwood. Hell, even Wilf's Silver Shroud team even did a more efficient job. Not that Wilfred Mott knew the Doctor yet, but you get the point. Even setting a trap for the Doctor would have been more effective. But the poor skills of LINDA are nothing compared to the ease with which the alien is ultimately dispatched. Because the creature's cane is central to his continued survival, it would have been wise to first keep that information from those he has ingested until they were more fully incorporated, or at the very least, made some attempt to secure the cane against damage. A member of LINDA or any other human exposed to the Abzorbaloff could have killed him through sheer accident. What could possibly top the sheer buffoonery of the alien who didn't even need the Doctor to meet his end?