Why It Is Literally Impossible To Hate AEW

by Michael Sidgwick
Wardlow AEW
AEW

Wardlow differs from Batista in that he isn't playing a megastar before he actually became one; as revealed on this week's Dynamite, he grew up poor, and took the money before slowly beginning to realise just what a piece of sh*t MJF is. He had good reason to take the money, too; nobody had heard of him before AEW existed, and at that time, the kick pad wrestler was more in vogue than the throwback muscle head.

But the slow-burn booking pattern is similar, as is the understated, show-don't-tell body language, and Wardlow, through his handsome looks and awesome physique, is sculpted in Vince McMahon's image. As is Jade Cargill. If you built a female sports entertainer from the ground up, she'd look like Jade Cargill.

Adam Cole and Eddie Kingston are victims of rank body-shaming by the supermodels who take a quick break from supping cocktails in exotic locales to open Reddit and bury Keith Lee. You cannot possibly think they look bad (they don't, f*ck off) and not think Wardlow and Cargill look good. This - again - is impossible.

You are unable to dislike All Elite Wrestling even on some small, isolated level unless you have literally been brainwashed by Vince McMahon.

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Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and current Undisputed WWE Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!