Someday, years from now, we will tell our childrens children that wrestling actually used to be good. It actually used to make sense! In this future, Raw will forego a wrestling ring completely in favor of three hours of vomiting skits, along with plenty of dancing wrestlers, little people in costumes, self aware sock hands, evil vaudeville wrestlers, evil hippies, evil authority figures, a ballroom dancer, and announcers that exist solely to make each other laugh. Kind of like now, but more so. No one will believe us. This week we continued the march towards Money in the Bank and discovered that there will now be two ladder matches on the show. With 11 people leaving the company last week, this means basically everyone on the roster besides the Divas, Damien Sandow (who won last year) and Heath Slater will be receiving a title shot. We also heard Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns both receive new theme songs, which means The Shield is effectively over. Lastly we celebrated that TNA somehow, despite all the odds, and lack of common sense, managed to stay alive another year. So what was the worst of it all in the world of wrestling? Lets do our best Great Khali, take the Punjabi Plunge and find out!
As Rust Cohle from True Detective said "Life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. So be careful what you're good at."
Sadly, I can't solve a murder like Rust...or change a tire, or even tie a tie. But I do know all the lyrics to Hulk Hogan's "Real American" theme song and can easily name every Natural Born Thriller from the dying days of WCW. I was once ranked 21st in the United States in Tetris...on the Playstation 3 version...for about a week.
Follow along @AndrewSoucek and check out my podcast at wrestlingwithfriends.com
