10 Insultingly Dumb Superman Comic Storylines
5. Superman Adopts His Best Friend - Superman's Pal Jimmy Olsen #30 (1958)
Clark Kent was only working at The Daily Planet for a little while before he became chummy with a reporter called Jimmy Olsen. After rescuing him many times as Superman, Jimmy became known as Superman's Best Friend. As the character became more popular, he got his own series called Superman's Pal, Jimmy Olsen.
In the story, The Son of Superman, Supes decides to adopt Jimmy as a foster child. This is a bit weird since Jimmy is, y’know, a grown man.
Jimmy thinks it's cool that the world's most beloved hero is his step-father. However, Superman bullies Jimmy relentlessly, ordering him to do all the housework and clean his trophies. To cheer up his "dad", Jimmy buys him a dressing gown for Father's Day. Superman hates the gift so much, he incinerates it. Jimmy is so heartbroken, he annuls the adoption.
Just when you thought this story couldn’t get more preposterous, Jimmy learns Superman was being rude to him on purpose because his Prophecy Machine told him he would destroy his son if he were to ever have one. Unsurprisingly, this Prophecy Machine has never been mentioned before or since.