10 Most Embarrassing Comic Book Deaths

2. Mary-Jane Watson Parker (Spider-Man Reign, 2006)

Villain Bites
Marvel Comics

A four-part story arc starring a retired Spider-Man modeled after the seminal Batman story The Dark Knight Returns? Sounds like a slam dunk.

Unfortunately, the execution of 2006’s Reign was yet another lackluster story featuring the neighborhood friendly Spider-Man. Taking place thirty years into the future, New York City has become an oppressive totalitarian state under rule of the city’s mayor. Peter Parker, in his late-60s, leads a quiet life as a florist, giving up the duties of Spider-Man after his wife Mary-Jane had passed. A comically old J. Jonah Jameson desperately implores Parker to return as Spider-Man, stating that the city needs him now more than ever before.

After having visions of his deceased wife, Parker once again takes up the mantle of Spider-Man, but is defeated by the Sinister Six, under direct command of the Mayor. The dead body of Doctor Octopus, now controlled by his sentient tentacles, comes to Spider-Man’s aid. The tentacles bring Parker to the graves of Aunt May, Uncle Ben, and Mary Jane, as Doctor Octopus’ dying wish was that Parker would once again become Spider-Man. Parker immediately breaks down and recalls how his radioactive semen riddled Mary Jane with cancer, and that he was the cause of her death. Eww.

Contributor
Contributor

Ryan Lynch is a freelance journalist from the United States. He currently lives in Adelaide, Australia and writes for Adelaide-based music magazine Rip It Up. He wishes he could live like Hank Moody, but he watches too much TV and plays too many videogames to be that nonchalant.