10 Secret Ways Video Games Make You Feel Like A Badass
4. Off-Screen Goon Syndrome
“Hey boss”, yelps the suited goon, “why can’t we just all jump the hero at the same time? He can’t beat us all at once!”
”No”, replies the boss, “you must attack the hero one at a time, whilst encircling them and saying one of three taunts repeatedly.”
Game enemies are purposely like this, of course, to give the player a chance, because being wailed on by twenty identical henchmen simultaneously doesn’t make for a very enjoyable game (but does make for a good pornography search term).
However, did you notice that enemies in contemporary games rarely attack when they’re off-screen? In fact, some games disable aggressive AI routines altogether whilst they’re off-screen, meaning they literally can’t harm you if you’re not looking at them.
Games that don’t restrict off-screen enemy AI normally lead to a number of cheap and/or unfair deaths - anyone who’s played Ninja Gaiden 3 can tell you, there’s no joy in defeating a room full of enemies only to be shot by a rocket launcher from off-screen, randomly, without warning.
He should’ve done what all well-designed game enemies do - he should’ve waited his damned turn.