10 Video Games That Mock Bad Players
5. Katamari Damacy
For the uninitiated, Katamari Damacy asks the player to roll an alien object around various environments that sticks to anything it pass overs with the hope of growing a gigantic ball (or “katamari”) of wonderful nonsense. Basically it’s bizarre but it’s also pretty brutal when it feels like you haven’t done enough.
If the player fails to put together a big enough katamari, they are brought before their Father, the King of All Cosmos, who is in a particularly sombre mood. As rain falls and thunder claps, the protagonist weeps on his hands and knees, almost begging for forgiveness.
Stand-out lines from the King’s rant about your “nasty” katamari include “this is not your fault but ours for believing in you” and “we should’ve asked your cousins instead”. To top it all off he asks the player to “forget about everything” and “go away”. When a video game tells you to give up on it then it really makes you question what you’re doing with your free time.
There’s a prevailing air of “we’re not angry, we’re just disappointed”. For a title so wonderfully weird and cheerfully charming, Katamari Damacy sure knows how to tap into some deep-rooted traumas we all have.