11 Off-Map Video Game Secrets You Won't Believe

7. Talking Torture Victims - Unreal: Return To Na Pali (1999)

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GT Interactive

Unreal is a sorely neglected game these days, despite a good chunk of AAA developers still using an upgraded version of its namesake engine. In many ways, the sci-fi shooter served as a precursor to critical darlings of the genre such as Half-Life and Halo, and its multiplayer-focussed spin-off, Unreal Tournament, vastly overtook it in terms of popularity.

This aside, if you happen to go exploring in the expansion, Return to Na Pali, you'll come across a deep pit with a seemingly bottomless red expanse. Using the series' infamous Fly cheat, you can float safety down to a narrow pillar, around which are four beings impaled on spikes.

"No secrets for you!" one will say in a text box if you fly near it. Another asks "Why me?", while the third, lamenting the pointlessness of his being stuck there, simply says, "I'm in a lot of pain and I fail to see humor in any of this."

Bet you feel bad now, eh? That'll teach you for poking your nose where it shouldn't be.

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Graduate composer, on-and-off session musician, aspiring novelist, professional nerd. Where procrastination and cynicism intertwine, Lee Clarke can be found.