5. Ride To Hell: Retribution
The front cover of Ride to Hell shows a biker patch that says 1%. I'm going to go ahead and assume that it represents the average rating it receives from players. They say you can't judge a book by its cover, but this is a game not a book. And if you saw the cover and thought, "this looks like a cash in on Sons of Anarchy's popularity and is probably awful." You'd be right. Another fairly recent game, Ride to Hell came out in June for Xbox and PS3. It tells the story of a biker returning from Vietnam and swearing not to get involved with gang violence. But guess what? Promise broken. And speaking of broken, that's what the game is. For starters it looks horrible. Unless you like brown textures, in which case you'll be in graphical heaven. And you can look at those brown backgrounds for ages as you drive on needlessly long bike rides, watching textures struggle to load constantly. For a game based around being a biker, they didn't make being on a bike all that fun either. In fact, fun is something that they forgot to programme into most aspects of Ride to Hell. The fighting and shooting sections take forever because the targeting and controls are so bad and the camera has a mind of its own. On top of everything, my least favourite gaming mechanic rears it's ugly head. Quick time events. And lots of them. If the broken gameplay isn't enough to make it feel like a literal Ride to Hell, the storyline will surely give you a good giggle. Horrible voice acting, a boring story and gratuitous misogyny are rampant in a game that's funny in its desperate attempt to seem cool and edgy. It fails on all accounts.