Final Fantasy 7 Remake: 8 Things NOBODY Wants To Admit

6. The Dialogue Is Cringeworthy

Final Fantasy 7 remake
Square-Enix

"But it's just a JRPG, what do you expect?" or "Well, the dialogue in the original was bad!" are not good excuses for writing that can be fairly described as utter bobbins.

In 2020, after Firewatch, Witcher 3, God of War, Her Story and countless other games with maturely present characters all having a degree of humanity, we've come to expect a lot more than FFVIIR's cliché-riddled, overblown anime nonsense.

Again, it's not a uniform issue.

Some of the interactions between Barrett and Cloud on missions, for example, whilst a symptom of a modern sensibility called "nobody ever shuts the f*ck up", feel genuine in a way FFXV's Backstreet Boys did. The entire scene with Elmyra describing her adoption of Aerith - largely lifted verbatim from the original - is legitimately emotive. The writing has its moments.

But mostly, it's cringey lines like something out of your old LiveJournal fanfic, interspersed by anime groans. And nothing is ever, ever left unsaid. When Aerith hands Cloud a flower, taken aback, he exclaims, "a flower?!" On the PS1, this line made sense, with visuals mostly abstractions of the events unfolding. When we can see said flower in super high-definition (albeit blurry textured) form? It makes you make one of those daft noises they all do.

Editorial Team
Editorial Team

Benjamin was born in 1987, and is still not dead. He variously enjoys classical music, old-school adventure games (they're not dead), and walks on the beach (albeit short - asthma, you know). He's currently trying to compile a comprehensive history of video game music, yet denies accusations that he purposefully targets niche audiences. He's often wrong about these things.