The 14 Dumbest Things In Star Trek: Insurrection

Star Trek is almost universally laughable when it attempts to be cool. Nothing in Insurrection exemplifies this more than Riker calling for the “manual steering column.” This apparatus is a pop-up pillar that at a glans, er, glance, is downright phallic. With its tapered apex, it erupts from the floor like a tumescent jack in the box and spits up a joystick.

That joystick is an off-the-shelf Gravis Blackhawk that many computer gamers in the audience would, and did, instantly recognize.

A basic joystick only gives you yaw and pitch and roll, which is fine for an airplane but not so good for a spacecraft. And where are the throttles? Where are the readouts? It should have been a futuristic take on a submarine or aircraft control yoke or something better suited to steering a starship than playing Microsoft Flight Simulator. A little more effort could have yielded some audience excitement. Instead, the stick elicited laughs and groans.