10 Mistakes All Wrestling Fans Make
5. Chanting Along With Sparklecrotch
When Seth Rollins trotted out his "Sparklecrotch" catchphrase, it rolled the eyes of everybody save a few hundred fans and, unfortunately for us all, Vince McMahon. The Chairman reportedly thought it was absolutely hilarious.
So too did just enough fans for microphones to pick up. Sad is it is, that collective mild grin was enough to make it stick. This was by design; as Rollins feigned awe at the apparently deafening reaction, he momentarily lost the ability to speak, quietly encouraging the chant.
Seals, the lot of you: too many people followed suit, and the word has entered the WWE lexicon. Imagine watching a three-camera sitcom, and one of the characters, the cool one, takes umbrage with his kooky flatmate's glittery boxer shorts. "Hey Sparklecrotch!" he says, to the forced backdrop of canned laughter. That wouldn't make it past The Big Bang Theory writer's room. So what is it doing in a main event wrestling rivalry?
You have a voice. You used it to reject the sudden, contrived and wholly unwarranted 2014 babyface Batista push, enabling the magic of WrestleMania XXX. Don't waste it on the enablement of lame scripted comedy.