13 WWE SummerSlam 2018 Results Predictions

5. Miz-taaaaaaaaaaake!!!

SummerSlam Results Predictions
WWE

WWE treat a lot of their stars as a child would a brand new action figure. The first day that shiny new Tatanka is removed from its cardboard casing, the excitement is palpable, quickly followed by an insta-push in the kid's plastic promotion. For a week or so, no toy even gets a look in.

Then the aura fades, the chips begin to appear, the possibilities close in, and poor Chris Chavis' effigy finds itself sinking to the bottom of the box. Occasionally, it'll escape its hermetic prison, but otherwise, it's bound for the charity shop.

That's Daniel Bryan then, except he wasn't even new, but returning from a long-forgotten loan at an ex-friend's house. WWE just don't seem to give two sh*ts about their Limited Edition collectable, having broke the case protector and squandered his value. Pity.

Prediction: Playtime ends at The Miz's hands, Daniel Bryan browses Skyscanner for flights to Tokyo.

Editorial Team
Editorial Team

Benjamin was born in 1987, and is still not dead. He variously enjoys classical music, old-school adventure games (they're not dead), and walks on the beach (albeit short - asthma, you know). He's currently trying to compile a comprehensive history of video game music, yet denies accusations that he purposefully targets niche audiences. He's often wrong about these things.