10 Stupidly Awful Gaming Prisons Staffed By Total Idiots

5. Bolingsbroke Penitentary €“ GTA V

Ah, Bolingsbroke Penitentary. Residing on Los Santos' arid flatlands, it has as much to do with the main GTA story as a harmonica-playing unicorn. Yes, I know they make out that Brad's there and that's what keeps Trevor sweet, but such is the state of Canada's favourite meth-toting, speed-injecting son that you could've told him anything and he'd believe you. Remember, this is the same man who rode a scooter down a freeway in a dress while yelling scooter buddies at his fellow vehicle-riding bretheren €“ truth is very much an abstract concept. But still, credit where credit's due €“ the prison appears to be armed with the ordnance of a small failed state and makes for an interesting pitched battle if you find yourself with more money and time than sense. Yet what makes this place embarrassingly awful in penal terms is just how accessible it is. Yes, I know it's easy to access if you fall from the skies like a hairy pebble, but that's not what I mean. What I'm getting at is that you can straight-up get inside if you just fast-travel a taxi to a waypoint inside its fences. Of course, you'll be shot to sh*t by the baffled officers who just noticed a big yellow taxi materialise on their yard like an urban TARDIS, but the point remains. Personally, I'd loved to have seen the scene in between the camera fading to black and popping back in €“ that of a jaded gate officer just whistling through an anonymous cab-driver with a shifty-looking bloke in the back. He's going to have one hell of a tribunal in the aftermath of your meth-addled assault, and somehow, I don't think explaining away why he let an armor-clad, weapon-wielding nutcase (and his Hispanic, easy-going driver who listens to Latino radio) onto police grounds with a simple 'I was bored, and he looked so trustworthy, you guys' is going to cut it. Bloody typical really, you just can't get the staff.