15 Most Badass Monologues In Video Game History

7. "I Don't Want Your Damn Lemons!" (Portal 2)

A Portal quote without GLaDOS may sound akin to lemonade without lemons, but you won't want either of those things after you hear Cave Johnson's enraged takedown of the "when life gives you lemons" axiom. Mr. Johnson, (voiced by the brilliant J.K. Simmons) is the founder of Aperture Science, and his indignant speech about never settling for any crap life throws at you and always demanding more is the kind of motivational speech a tough, war-veteran father would give his son over dinner - before throwing his plate at the wall.

This speech recalls Howard Beale's "I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not gonna take it any more" speech from Network. It's a refutation of settling for less, of being grateful for pitiful returns in life. In fact, go to the window right now and scream "I don't want your damn lemons!" It'll be one of the most cathartic experiences in your life, and there's a slight chance that you'll cause a chain reaction of everyone living on your street doing the same

In this post: 
Bioshock
 
First Posted On: 
Contributor
Contributor

Gamer, Researcher of strange things. I'm a writer-editor hybrid whose writings on video games, technology and movies can be found across the internet. I've even ventured into the realm of current affairs on occasion but, unable to face reality, have retreated into expatiating on things on screens instead.